I put this on Tumblr recently, and it’s just fantastic, fantastic enough to deserve to be here as well. Enjoy
“I used to believe in natural theology, but since I met you I’ve converted to divine revelation.”
“Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from Gilead.”
“How many times do I have to walk around you to make you fall for me?”
“You are so unblemished that I would sacrifice you.”
“I sacrifice my Sunday mornings to look after the creche group. It’s tough, but I love children.”
“I have a job.”
“I’m kind of a big deal at Koorong.”
“I’m sorry, COD?”
“So, my parents are home. You want to come over?”
“If I had to choose between a romantic date with you or a night with the fellas, I would sit at home and read my Bible.”
“I would bring your father twelve-hundred Philistine foreskins for just one date with you.”
And for those medieval Roman Catholic clergy out there:
“Let me sell you an indulgence because it’s a sin to look as good as you do.”
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I’m glad you chucked one in for the medieval Roman Catholic clergy. Those guys constitute an often forgotten sector of Sydney society in the 21st century.